This blog post ties into the PTSD chat podcast and the #PTSDChat on twitter on
Wed. Oct. 20, 2021
Consider this:
“The prime directive of the unconscious mind is to keep you
safe.”
Your unconscious mind runs your body, your responses, it
holds your values, beliefs and morals. It doesn’t filter anything. So negative
thoughts, beliefs and feelings and positive thoughts, beliefs and feelings are
the same to the unconscious mind; it’s all just data for the unconscious mind
to use to run your body. It also has no concept of time, so it can literally respond
instantly.
So, if the unconscious mind is going to use everything as
data, then ideally, giving it as much positive data to help in your healing and
well being is just another tool you can use to your benefit. So let’s look at
things through a different perspective. Let’s take a look at ourselves through
the looking glass of PTSD symptomology and gain some insight into how we can
make small changes which have the potential to make a big impact. It’s all in
your (unconscious) mind.
Now, let’s take a look at how we speak about ourselves and
our health. Are we speaking in positive terms? Think about it. If someone were to ask you:
“How are you?” what would your answer be? I am amazed by how
many people answer this question with “I’m not bad…” “Not bad” does not mean “good”!
The word with the most impact in this
response is “bad”. The unconscious takes this data and processes it as “feel
bad” and you will find as the day goes on, you begin to feel worse than you did
earlier in the day.
Want some immediate proof? When someone says, “You look
great!” or compliments you, your body immediately responds. You smile, your
stand a little taller, your energy picks up, you may even talk about changes
you have made to your routine. If they
say “Are you ok, you look pale” what’s your immediate response? “You start to
feel tired, your comments reflect theirs and you say things like “I didn’t sleep
well” “I think I’m coming down with a cold” etc. This is how quickly the unconscious mind can
impact the body.
Listen to the words you use. Talk about healing without linking
it directly to illness. Talk about your progress rather than what you are still
working on. “I’m sleeping so much better these days” rather than “I only get 5
hours of sleep a night, if I’m lucky”. “I am feeling a little more comfortable
being around people (or in crowds) now.” “Things are improving; I feel good
about my progress”. This isn’t about affirmations, its about recognizing and acknowledging
our progress and speaking about it in the most positive terms. We want as much
positive data going into our unconscious minds as possible to increase our
progress. We want our mind to work with us to heal body, mind and spirit.
So let’s look at the body and what the unconscious mind
tells us through our body. We very often speak our pain unconsciously. “I feel
like I’m carrying the world on my shoulders”. Do you have shoulder pain? Back
pain? Arm and/or hand pain? Ask yourself “what are am I carrying?” It can be
emotional, or mental, or physical both our own baggage and also from the
perspective of providing/caring for others.
Giving others emotional support, financial support, or doing
tasks/errands/taking them to appointments, etc. has a physical impact on you as
you are carrying their needs as well as your own. You may even be prioritizing
their needs over your own to the point where the physical body is telling you that
you cannot keep carrying/shouldering all this. Your shoulders ache, your back hurts. What steps can you take to
improve the physical manifestation of what you’re carrying? Massage, working
out, physiotherapy, gardening/yardwork, stretching, mindful walking, even journaling
may help to shift the pain because you’re getting it out of your system by
writing it down. Also the most obvious, prioritize you and your healing.
Lower body issues, tie into “relationships”, “support” and “life
balance”. Ask yourself, “Where am I not
being supported?” “Where do I believe/think (or am being told) I am not
supporting others?”(also known as guilt) or “What area of my life is
unbalanced?” If it’s mobility issues, ask “Where am I stuck?” or “What is
stopping me from moving forward?”
Flexibility issues anywhere in the body can be seen as “Where
am I being inflexible?” Or “Am I being too rigid in my thinking, in my feelings,
in my relationships?” Tie this together into upper body “carrying” or lower
body “relationships/support/life balance” and feel how ties together. So, for
example, if the joints of the legs are feeling stiff, what you may need to ask
yourself is “Where I am being inflexible about giving or receiving support?”
Are you only willing to accept support on your terms? Are you only willing to provide
support under certain conditions? Do you feel like you don’t need anyone’s support,
that you have to do everything on your own? “Where am I being inflexible in my
relationships?” (spouse, kids, friends, colleagues, etc)
And finally, let’s talk about your spirit. Your unconscious
mind holds your deepest beliefs, your values, your morals. You could call it
your soul or the core of your being, the very essence of you. Unfortunately, we
can experience trauma to our spirit. Things happen that “shake your faith” that
shatter your world and you are set adrift, feeling lost and alone. Healing from
a moral trauma can be one of the most challenging. We often want to know “why”.
Why me?, Why this?, Why now?...why…why….why.
We want answers, we want justice, we want to believe in good, we want to
have faith in ourselves and in others. Moral traumas, tear us to the very core
of our being.
This for me, is the one I find is the most challenging. To
regain faith. What I have found, through my own PTSD experience is I had to let
go of the “why”. We can create answers, or be given answers, yet neither really
give us peace as we feel there has to be “more to it than that” and we
continually search for the answer to “why”.
Dropping the need to know “why”, is the only way I have
found some peace. I have learned to accept the event as “it was what it was”,
so it has now become a neutral thought. I am making progress in my healing around
the event. Have I made peace with it completely? My answer is “It’s still a
work in progress”. Do I have peace? Some, I am still working on gaining more
peace. Do I believe I will ever be at peace with it? Yes. I am looking forward
to the day when I’m at peace with it and my faith in myself and others has been
rebuilt.
Healing mind, body and spirit is a journey. When we are able
to draw conscious awareness from all three aspects, we are able to provide the
unconscious mind with much more positive data to help enhance and speed up our
healing journey.
Blessing to you as you journey along your path to healing.
